Put your iTunes/Winamp/WMP on shuffle. Say the following questions aloud, and press play. Use the song title as the answer to the question. NO CHEATING.[*1]
1. How does the world see me?
["Cleopatra's Cat" - Spin Doctors] Meow meow? :-)
2. Will I have a happy life?
[ "14th Street" - Emily Spray ] I see you walking up 14th street, and you don't know / That I'm walking behind you, counting the steps as I go/ maybe ten steps or twelve, divide us two / but that doesn't count all the blocks between me and you A bittersweet song about infatuation never quite realized, and distances.. not sure it's the most encouraging of songs. The Laura Cantrell version is subtly happier, this one sadder and frustrated.
3. What do my friends think of me?
[ "Shoehorn With Teeth - Marching Band" - They Might be Giants] Err.. I want a shoehorn, the kind with teeth? But maybe I can tour the world in a heavy metal band. That'd be good.
4. Do people secretly lust after me?
["Pawn Shop" - Sublime ] Hurrah! I'm a pawn star.
5. How can I make myself happy?
[ "Pure Imagination" - Gene Wilder, Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory] Well dang. Living there, you'll be free, if you truly wish to be. Now that's rather thought-provoking..
6. What should I do with my life?
[ "Miracle Drug"- U2] I've had enough of romantic love / I'd give it up, yeah, I'd give it up / For a miracle, a miracle drug, a miracle drug Ooof. But. Hmmm.
7. Will I ever have children?
["The Conscious Rapper" - KRS-One] The kindergärtners at the start of the track talking to KRS-One seem to indicate yes, if anything in the song would.
8. What is some good advice for me?
["Mainestream" - The Bakerton Group] *grooves to instrumental*
9. How will I be remembered?
["Oh Madonna (You Stole My Pants)" - Bingo Gazingo] ...
10. What's my signature dancing song?
[ "Which MC Was That" - MC Frontalot] - A track from the In The Groove dancing video game. Appropriate.
11. What's my current theme song?
["Clint Eastwood" - Gorillaz] *headnods to the slow-groove beats* I'm useless, but not for long/ the future is comin' on.
12. What do others think is my current theme song?
["I Wanna Be Sedated" - The Offspring, We're a Happy Family- A Tribute to the Ramones] Punk lives! I do wear a leather jacket, jeans, and t-shirt pretty often.. do have Dee Dee's haircut currently.. must be.
13. What shall they play at my funeral?
["Destruction of Space Colony" - Minako Hamano, Metroid: Sound In Action] Apparently I shall die in a tragic video game accident. IN SPACE.
14. What type of wo/men do I like?
["Video Bargainville" - Moxy Fruvous] Either I'm going to feel vaguely insulted at the implication I have to rent my women, or, I like Slickpuppy who works at Wonder Book&Video. (o_O) Or, for that matter, my sister who works at Hollywood Video- mind, I get along well with my sister, but, not like that.
15. How's my love life?
["It's Been A Long Time" - unknown band, off a mix CD from Hak Doo, last year's South Korean intern] The title alone is depressing enough, but worse is my love life represented by the Korean equivalent of n*Sync.
--Chiaroscuro
[*1] If it landed on a podcast, I fast-forwarded. Eh. :)